


Who's Been Loving You Good?

by selinameh



Series: starships were meant to fly au [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Enemies to Casual Acquaintances, Fluff, IN SPACE!, M/M, Misunderstandings, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-06-06 06:59:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15189335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/selinameh/pseuds/selinameh
Summary: Who knew that getting your ass handed to you by Loki on a daily basis would be considered a great pass of time?





	Who's Been Loving You Good?

**Author's Note:**

> I know very little about anything concerning Bruce when it comes to mcu and whatnot but he is so good and soft and so is Thor and this seemed like a good way to process my feelings on the matter. And I'm aware Bruce is all "I'm angry all the time" in the Avengers but hey ho I choose to ignore it. Like I choose to ignore many things.
> 
> Oh and yes the title is from Hayley Kiyoko's "Curious" because why not.

 

 

 

“Do you feel anger?”

Bruce dropped the clipboard he had been holding, cursing silently under his breath as the plastic made contact with the metal floors of the sickbay. The flat sound echoed in the room, disrupting its temporary, albeit hard-wrought peace. Bruce turned around on his heels and his eyes landed on Loki, who was loitering near the entrance.

“You serious?”

“Deadly.”

Bruce combed his hand through his hair.

“I get so angry I turn into a gigantic green-- thing, who just wants to destroy anything it comes into contact with”, Bruce said as he bent down to pick the clipboard as well as the pen that had rolled with it. This was the first day in a while that he wasn’t crowded by Asgardians and their injuries, and he’d been looking forward to spending it in peace and restoring what little mental tranquility he had left. But of course the  _god of inconveniences_ would choose this specific moment to approach him.

“I do not mean the Hulk. I am well aware of his inclinations. But here I was wondering whether you yourself are capable of feeling anger, or whether it is completely out of your hands, so to speak." Loki left his position near the doorway and stepped closer. Bruce couldn’t help but shuffle backwards, trying to quell the feeling of unease he got whenever he was in close contact with Loki. Yet when he thought about it, that was probably among his more healthier emotional responses.

“I- Yes?”, Bruce walked over to one of the sickbeds and put down the clipboard, “I feel angry, at times, yes, like for example back in Asgard-”

“You let Hulk take over”, Loki reminded him.

“Yes, but before that. I was angry. I, I was angry? That grandmaster, yeah, not the nicest-”

“Or was that merely frustration? Were you scared, annoyed even? Perhaps you felt anxious? But did you feel  _angry_?” the look on Loki’s face was intense and he seemed intent on getting an answer out of Bruce.

Bruce didn’t know what to say. He’d never really given into this line of thought, preferring to think about the other guy as little as possible. It was enough for him to know that anger triggered the transformation and then nothing was no longer in his hands.

“I’ll see my questions aren’t as easily answered as I hoped”, Loki said after witnessing Bruce’s struggle to find an answer. He sounded disappointed as he bid Bruce farewell with a small nod, before leaving the room.

Well that was weird. Bruce stared after the god, brain suddenly going a mile a minute. Before this, all his interactions with Loki could be counted with one hand, not to mention they were usually limited to one word at best. Was the god after something?

Why did he even question that, of course he was after something.

Bruce was so preoccupied by his anxious mullings, that he failed to notice someone else entering the room. Then there was a slap on his shoulders and Bruce let out the most embarrassing sound. He wasn't good at being surprised, his muscles coiled in never-easing tension 24 hours a day.

“Ah, Bruce, you ought to pay more attention to your surroundings”, Thor said as his way of greeting and crowded against the other man, trying to peak at the tablet that Bruce had just picked up in an effort to distract himself. His thoughts were not going any way good, he could tell that already.

“It’s this goddamn ship, like a white noise machine, constantly lulling me to sleep”, Bruce answered, “Although, it does keep me calm. Or, calmer than usually, anyway.”

“Did I just see you exchanging words with my brother?” Thor asked, and the smile that had grazed his lips turned sour in the blink of an eye, “Is there something wrong with the ship again?”

“What? No”, Bruce answered hastily, “It was just chit chat. Like, a normal conversation. We have those now, apparently.”

“Oh, well that is good. Is he trying to make amends?” Thor asked, “Or-- Was he overly curious? Did he ask you about your family, or what's that thing Tony mentioned… social security number? I must warn you not to give too much information to Loki. He has a way of, huh, being mischievous.”

Thor scratched his short-shorn hair, a troubled look on his face. Mischievous, sure. Bruce snorted.

“Nah, nothing like that. Don’t worry about it”, Bruce smiled, attempting to set Thor’s mind at ease. The god had enough to worry about as it was, with the ship malfunctioning in unexpected ways and the Aesir getting cabin fever. If Bruce had to take care of a one more stabbing victim, he would--

“Well, then I'll be on my way. I look forward to seeing you at supper later. Now I must go find Valkyrie, as she promised to show me the ins and outs of her old training regimen. Isn't it exciting, me, Thor, training with a Valkyrie!”

Bruce let out a laugh, and watched the other leave with a spring in his step. A familiar feeling of warmth bloomed in his chest, settling around his heart. It was something that had started to happen around Thor more often than not. In other words, he was besotted, utterly gone, and he couldn’t have chosen a more inconvenient place to do it. A ship in the middle of uncharted space didn’t exactly scream fertile dating ground, not to mention he could never actually make himself do it. Thor was a god, for fuck’s sake. A muscle-bound norse marvel with a smile that managed to drag even Bruce out of his reverie, something not many people had managed since the incident.

And Thor was a friend, too. A good one at that, so there was no way Bruce would ever actually act on his ill-conceived ideas. He’d ignore it until it would pass and then everything would be right as rain. So what if the space ship made things a bit more difficult, being a small enclosed space, not to mention Thor’s inability to adjust to the ship’s climate controls and hence walking around shirtless because “the air was too bothersome". 

Thankfully Bruce had had a lot of training smothering his emotions, or their stay on the ship would have become really uncomfortable really fast, for everyone on board.

 

A day passed and Loki didn’t approach him again. This should have been a good sign, but somehow Bruce had let this get to him, against his better judgement. The god’s inquiries had awakened something within him. Ever since the incident, Bruce has kept his emotions in check, finding ways to work around extreme reactions. There were the hundred different schools of meditation and visualization, breathing exercises, those handy asmr videos kids kept posting on Youtube, colouring books, and what have you. Long story short, if someone had come up with a way to work around emotions and calm down, he’d done it. Probably twice.

Yet here he was now, standing on the deck of a stolen space ship, staring into the infinite blackness around him, questioning his emotional integrity because a norse god had remarked on it. He was annoyed at himself for being so hung up on Loki’s words. So he wasn't angry, big deal. It was a bad emotion to start with, not something he ever really needed. Bruce had enough on his plate without it. Yeah, sometimes he felt this oddly hollow feeling somewhere behind his rib cage, pulsing in tandem with his heart and making him feel unable to act. But what did anger had to do with it?

A long-suffering sigh crawled its way out of Bruce. He needed to search Loki out and ask what the god had been getting at.

Nobody seemed to know where Loki was. Everyone was just avoiding the man. Trying to stay out of his way. Bruce himself had adopted this tactic too, but now that he wanted to talk with Loki, it proved out to be less than helpful. The only person aboard the ship that actively acknowledged Loki’s presence, besides Thor, who could do very little else, was Valkyrie, who’d taken a weird liking to the man. Actually, Bruce wasn’t sure liking was the right word. Maybe more along the lines of morbid fascination or hostile curiosity.

“You want to talk with him?” she asked, a look of disbelief marring her face.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Why? What- I don’t- I-” Bruce felt flustered.

“Nah, I don’t care. He’s near the cargo bay, sulking”, Valkyrie said and took a sip of a drink she’d just seemingly conjured out of nowhere. ”Although he keeps claiming he’s not sulking, only,” and someone had taught Valkyrie air quotes, “‘Pondering’. Whatever.”

Bruce thanked her for the information and turned to leave, when the woman stopped him by propping her food in front of her.

“Did you see Thor last night?” Valkyrie asked and the smirk on her face made Bruce suddenly feel quite antsy.

“I did”, he answered, “What did you do exactly? Tie him to a chair and throw bowling balls at him?”

“Hey, what you two do in bed is your business. And what are those? Do you put them in-”

“Stop it! Stop, no, that’s… bowling is a noble hobby. It’s not- don’t. We don’t do anything in bed”, Bruce stammered, blushing despite his best efforts to keep his cool.

“Yeah, sure thing small guy”, Valkyrie smirked, “The way you freeze around him is  _really_ subtle.”

Bruce wished he had a better poker face, but instead his mouth spasmed, eyes blinked and he let out a sputtering whine that left Valkyrie laughing in delight. Bruce wasn't sure when she'd pinned him as someone she could mercilessly make fun of, but it had happened almost as soon as they had stepped on board the ship and Bruce had managed pull himself back. It was done in good faith, at least Bruce liked to think so, as he had managed to build some sort of a relationship with the woman. It had taken a while for Valkyrie to stop poking him in order to drag Hulk back out, but they'd come a long way since.

“Fuck”, Bruce groaned, “Can you just, keep quiet? Please.”

“Hey, none of my business”, Valkyrie lifted her hands up in the apparently universal sign of surrender.

“It’s kind of cute”, she said, and patted Bruce on the back, trying to console him, “Maybe I should beat him up again so you could patch him up. Really target the upper body, so you get to run your hands on those abs-”

“I’m going”, Bruce said hastily and almost ran from the room.

 

Valkyrie was right and Bruce found Loki near the cargo bay, running his hands over the hull of the ship. Bruce didn’t say anything, not wanting to break Loki’s concentration. The ship around them was humming with a sense of purpose, eager to travel to their destination, wherever it was. Sure, Earth was the goal, but Bruce was more than a little sceptical.

Loki lowered his hand and left out a long exhale. Bruce wondered whether this was his cue to make his presence known, but Loki seemed to figure that out on his own. The god turned around, eyes settling on Bruce. The look on his face was not hostile nor anything else really, just blankly prompting Bruce to say what he had to say.

Which, now that Bruce thought about it, he should have thought beforehand.

“The ship’s still okay?”

“It will get us where we want to go”, was Loki’s answer, and he caressed the hull once more.

“I guess that’s all we can ask”, Bruce said. He looked around the room, cursing himself for not being more prepared. He wanted to talk to Loki about something, but that something was as illusory and vague as the god himself.

“Did you have something you wanted to ask me?”

“Yes.”

Yet that was all Bruce said and Loki arched one of his eyebrows. The blank look transformed into something more quizzical and he looked at Bruce as if searching for something. Whatever it was, Bruce hoped he wouldn’t find it.

“I- The thing you asked, about anger. I guess I haven’t ever really thought about it until you said it. About me not experiencing it. And, and… I don’t know. I guess I wanted to know what prompted you to ask it in the first place?” Bruce stammered a little, finding it difficult to put his racing thoughts into words. A problem he ran into quite often, if he was honest.

“I was merely bored”, Loki answered, dismissal clear in his voice.

“No, you searched me out. You never search me out. God, I don’t think we’ve ever spent longer than 5 minutes in the same room”, Bruce surprised himself by being as assertive as he was. He really knew how to pick his moments, huh, in an empty cargo bay on a spaceship with a volatile god of mischief and  _chaos_.

Loki’s silence was unnerving.

“Fine. I must admit that your particular situation has fascinated me for a while now.”

“Why’s that?”

“You are a walking contradiction. Anger is so inherently tied to you, yet you yourself do not get the sweet release of experiencing it. Your anger is reserved for someone else, forever out of your reach. It is quite a peculiar situation.”

Loki stopped for a brief moment, but Bruce could sense he wanted to continue, and stayed quiet.

“Sometimes I find myself being envious of you.

“To not be able to feel anger, for even a little while. I would welcome that peace with open arms. Alas, I find my thoughts occupied with little else” Loki said and turned to look at the cluster of boxes that occupied one of the corners of the room. Bruce found himself being relieved as the god's attention turned away from him, and he took a long inhale, trying to center himself.

“You’re angry?” Bruce asked.

“Yes. It is ever present. For having gone through what I have, you have very little options to choose from. I have found that as destructive as anger can be, it is preferable to the other option.”

“Which is?”

“Despair.”

They both fell silent.

“Anger is agency. Anger is helpful, active, something you can wield”, Loki went on, back to making eye contact with Bruce, “And you have been robbed of it.”

Well wasn’t this uncomfortable. Bruce didn’t understand how he got into these situations, not when he so studiously tried to avoid anything that could upset his well-cultivated state of mind. And yet Loki was making sense, which only added to Bruce's state of perplexity.

“You really have a way of making a man feel absolutely terrible, don’t you”, Bruce laughed, feeling oddly vulnerable in front of Loki.

“It wasn’t my intention, I can assure you. Just something I’ve been thinking about.”

“Hmm. I guess you’re right though. Sometimes I don't feel quite right, and this would explain it.”

Loki didn't comment anything, appearing deep in thought. Bruce had never entertained the idea that there was something connecting him to Loki, but now that he was standing there, in the quiet embrace of the ship, he couldn't help but take in the tense shoulders and the look that was directed somewhere no one but Loki could see, and see a reflection of himself. Loki had gone through things Bruce couldn't even begin to imagine, nor did he want to - but he'd learned to detect that sense of drifting and unbelonging that clung to anyone who'd gone through more than they should.

“Doesn’t it get tiring?” Bruce finally asked.

Loki raised his eyebrow, not sure what Bruce was going after.

“Being angry all the time? Like,  _fuck,_ that must drain you”, Bruce said.

Loki shrugged his shoulders.

“I manage.”

“Sure you do”, Bruce challenged and Loki’s face twisted immediately into a frown.

“But, like, take it from someone who’s had to deal with this quite a lot”, Bruce cleared his throat, “Being able to calm down is not all bad. Happy thoughts, you know, do have a certain charm.”

“What are you trying to say?”

What  _was_ he trying to say?

“I guess- I guess I could teach you? Or, at least show you, what I do to de-Hulk or keep the anger at an arm’s length?” Bruce said not believing the words that were coming out of his mouth. This was not he had been planning, not at all.

Loki looked sceptical, and he had every right to.  _Jesus Christ_ , what was wrong with Bruce. Sometimes his brain to mouth filter just stopped working, and it was extremely dangerous. Maybe he should go back to university and branch out, go into brain stuff next. Figure out what was going on with him.

“Are you offering to help me?”

“Ah, I- I guess?” Bruce said and ran his hand through his curls. Something for him to do.

An image of him meditating with Loki, lighting candles and sharing mantras entered Bruce’s mind and left him reeling. No way in hell, he would never-

“I must admit I’m intrigued.”

No. No!

“I could show you later tonight? I usually do it before going to sleep… I know you don’t really sleep but-”

“That sounds acceptable.”

“Bruce!”

Bruce looked up from his plate, mouth full of whatever asgardian sakaar fusion grub that had been on the menu. Thor was walking towards him, his usual smile grazing his face and filling Bruce with sense of joy that was in small supply these days. Bruce nodded his head, working to swallow the mouthful of stew.

“How have you been, friend? I haven’t seen you today and got worried- is there another illness giving you grief?” Thor sat opposite of Bruce on their small table.

“No, the Asgardians seem to be as healthy as ever. I’ve just been… doing… stuff”, Bruce caught himself before mentioning his earlier interaction with Loki. For some reason he didn’t feel like sharing that specific tidbit with Thor just yet. It felt private on some level. Now, he wasn’t sure why he cared about Loki’s privacy, but that’s how it was.

Thor seemed to sense that Bruce was holding something from him, but didn’t try to fish it out, opting to eat his generous serving of the same stew Bruce had in front of him.

This had become somewhat of a habit between the two of them, enjoying their dinner together. Thor was usually dashing around the ship for one reason or another, his kingly duties calling him to action, and Bruce rarely got the chance to chat with the guy during the day. However, supper time was now dedicated for their idle chitchat and Bruce would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy it.

Being together with Thor was so soothing and antagonising at the same time. Thor’s good humour and general kindness helped Bruce to calm down and anchor, but at the same time those qualities were causing Bruce to lose his mind.

Thor was a beautiful man. A beautiful  _god_. And while Bruce himself wasn’t exactly a human, his resistance against the god’s charms had been futile, doomed since the beginning. Ever since leaving Sakaar Bruce had developed an alarming habit of dozing off mid-conversations, only to find himself imagining what’d be like to frame Thor’s face with his calloused hands and pull him close. Needless to say, this had been extremely inconvenient, but thankfully Bruce had always carried an air of  _aloofness_ around him, making these momentary lapses more digestible for the people around him.

But god, Thor was  _beautiful_.

“Bruce?”

“Huh?” Bruce shook his head, trying to get rid of the images of Thor’s lips on his.

“I asked what you are doing this evening?” Thor asked, still smiling, “I was thinking we could give another shot to that sakarian game. I have a feeling those red buttons are somehow connected to the bean bags.”

“Oh. Right. Uh, I actually have plans.”

“You do?” Thor looked surprised and Bruce wasn’t going to blame him. He was famous for never having anything on in his schedule. It was a goddamn spaceship, what was there to do? Plenty, plenty to do was the answer, but Bruce was prone to anxiety on Earth, never mind fleeting through space.

“Yes.”  
  
“With who?”

“Uhh-”

“Oh”, Thor said, sounding weirdly disappointed, before coaxing his face into a smile again. “Don’t let me stand in your way friend. I am glad you have found something else to occupy your time with. We shall give the game a try some other time.” 

“Yeah… Yeah, some other time’s good.”

The conversation between them continued, focusing on what Thor had been doing earlier that day. Apparently there had been a bit of a discord between two Asgardian families, something that had been going on for the longest time, and while Thor tried his best to summarize a feud that had lasted for a couple centuries, Bruce did not follow at all. Yet he was happy to just nod and look at Thor’s animated face, as he got lost in the Asgardian histories.

Soon they were both done eating, and Bruce figured it’d be best to go to his little part of the ship before Loki decided to appear. He told Thor that he should be on his way, and Thor got that weird look back on his face. Bruce wasn’t sure why it was doing that, but he didn’t like it. Thor was so pretty when he smiled.

Thor got up from his chair and bid Bruce goodbye, lifting his hand on Bruce’s shoulder. The hand was heavy, yet Bruce welcomed the weight, feeling tethered to Thor’s energy. Thor was looking right at Bruce, a hesitant smile on his lips. It was very unlike Thor, who usually carried himself with such reassurance it put Tony to shame.

“I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening”, Thor said, the smile forming more solid and closer to what Bruce normally associated with Thor.

“You too”, Bruce answered back, his mouth feeling oddly dry.

 

Thankfully Loki wasn’t there when Bruce arrived. That gave the man couple moments alone, able to prepare himself for what was coming. For his own nerves, he tried to go about his routine like he normally would, as the idea of spending more time alone with Loki still felt a bit daunting. The god had been a far cry from the one Bruce had made contact with in New York, but that had still left a big impression and Bruce was having difficulties handing out second chances.

He was annoyed at himself for getting as wound up as he did. This was simply an exercise he was going to share with Loki, they weren’t becoming best friends and making blood oaths. He simply did what he could to help, something he’d do for everyone.

Someone cleared their throat behind Bruce.

“Oh you’re here”, Bruce stated, immediately feeling like an idiot. 

Loki didn’t say anything, which was fair. Bruce was the one being a stumbling ass. However, the god did look around, letting his eyes wander and taking in the little space Bruce had taken for himself. The spaceship wasn’t huge so there wasn’t enough rooms for everyone on board, but thankfully Bruce wasn’t too fussed. In the early days they had managed to procure some pillows and blankets, of which original use Bruce didn’t want to think about, and he’d found a cosy little corner away from the noise and hubbub of the busy ship. He was a man with simple tastes and quite frankly on a ship this size, all he craved was peace and quiet.

“It’s not as bad as I expected”, Loki finally said and Bruce let the comment slide.

“So”, Loki turned towards Bruce expectantly, “What is it that you do?”

“Oh. Right to the point, I can respect that”, Bruce said, “I usually meditate and maybe do some visualizing-”

Loki swept his hand, as if to show Bruce to go ahead. Allright. He could do this.

“Um. You want me to show you? Okay, here goes nothing”, Bruce said and sat on the floor cross-legged.

Loki looked at him. For a long time.

“Uh. I guess you can stand?” Bruce said. This was supposed to be his calming, grounding exercise, yet right now it felt anything but.

“Is sitting imperative?” Loki asked, clearly evaluating his options.

“Eh, I’m not sure? I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone doing it standing up but…”

Loki sat down, copying Bruce’s position.

“What then?”

“You just… breathe. Like, the important part is to pay attention to breathing and try not to think of anything else. But then also don’t try to contain your thoughts too hard, just let them come and go and try to focus on your body and breathing. But don’t focus too much, it’s really all about the balance and giving time for yourself…”

Bruce realized he’d been rambling a little too late and sheepishly trailed off. Loki was looking at him again with that really weird stare that made him question his life and his choices.

“Let me try to understand this”, Loki said, “You sit like this and you… try not to think?”

“Yes. It’s a quite common exercise. A lot of people do it back on Earth- or, Midgard."

“And you think it helps?”

“I know I’m not making the most convincing case here, but give it a shot. Maybe once we hit Earth I can show you couple books, there’re some good podcasts and this one youtube channel that-”

“This is how you manage your emotions? Sitting in a corner alone, actively avoiding them?”

“I’m not avoiding them, I’m… It’s… It’s all about listening what’s inside of you but trying not to let it bother you? Fuck, I don’t know how to explain this.”

“You really aren’t the most articulate”, Loki offered helpfully and Bruce shot him a dirty look.

“Just try it, okay? Close your eyes and take a couple of breaths…”

“You do it first.”

“Fine.”

Bruce took a long breath and closed his eyes with some difficulty, knowing that Loki was sitting not too far away from him, actively observing instead of just accidentally noticing from afar, as he usually tended to do on the ship.

It was a rocky start, but Bruce hadn’t been doing this for years for nothing. It was familiar now, one of the cornerstones of his day. Letting his mind go quiet and focusing on his breathing was-

“It looks like you’re doing nothing.”

Bruce’s eyes snapped open.

“It’s not really something you can observe”, he said, straightening his posture. “Try it. Worst case scenario you just sit there for 15 minutes doing nothing.”

Bruce closed his eyes, not waiting to see what would happen.

 

“And this is all you do?”

“Well, no. I do some visualization too and try to keep my diet balanced and a regular sleeping schedule-- I journal too.. although, to be fair, all of this has been in short supply for a while now.”

Loki was now standing again and Bruce, against his better judgement, was still on the floor, leaning against the wall. They had ended up sitting in silence for ten or so minutes, which, to be frank, was way more than Bruce had expected. But it was clear now that Loki wasn't too impressed.

“Hmm. Seems insufficient.”

“Well, it works for me. Helps me to keep track of what’s going on here”, Bruce said, tapping his head. “What’s it that you do to keep yourself in check, anyway?”

“Spar. Battle. Create chaos.”

“Well that sounds super fun.”

“Maybe you should give it a try.”

“What?” Bruce asked, gesturing at himself, “Green rage monster.”

“You’re letting him control you.”

“Hey, there’s very little I can do when he decides to show up. You think I enjoy subletting my limbic system?” Bruce got up and dusted his trousers.

Loki looked at him for couple seconds, clearly measuring him.

“I have tried your way and found it lacking. Maybe I should share my methods.”

“No. Absolutely not. We can’t have a Hulk-out on a spaceship. I know he came in all calm, but if he wakes up now? Surrounded by a black void? He’s going to flip. No.”

“Have a little faith”, Loki said as if it wasn’t the most outrageous thing he’d ever asked, and walked away from Bruce.

The nerve.  _The nerve_.  **The-**

 

Eighteen hours later Bruce was thrown against the metal hull of the spaceship. It didn’t hurt, per se, but it did leave his right shoulder throbbing. There was a sheen of sweat clinging to his face and his hair was all over the place. He got up, knees wobbling only a little bit, which he took as a sign of victory.

He had taken up Loki’s offer, against his better judgement. It turned out that Loki’s idea of controlling one’s anger was to beat it out of a person. And, again against Bruce’s better judgement, he’d decided to give it a try. There must’ve been something to it, having witnessed both Stark and Rogers destroying the sparring room more often than he cared to count. Gosh, as a man of science he knew, theoretically, that physical strain was a thing people did on the regular, like in sports, but ever since the trauma of living through puberty and high school PE, he’d never thought it’d be of service to him.

Yet here he was, voluntarily getting beaten by Loki.

“This wasn’t exactly what I had in mind”, Bruce said and rolled his shoulders, trying to get the blood flowing. “I was expecting more just general hazardy.”

“There is very little to do on this ship without bringing everyone on board to a sudden and violent death”, Loki said, not looking nearly as winded as Bruce hoped.

“So physical violence it is?”

“So physical violence it is.”

 

This started a very weird time for Bruce, and after Sakaar, hell, after New York, no, after the incident-- His bar for weird stuff was pretty low, like almost touching the ground low. Yet this was a new brand of weird, not in the way of alien invasions and space gladiators, but, emotional.

First off, during the couple of weeks they'd been doing this, he'd started to bond with Loki of all people, not something he’d ever admit out loud. Who knew getting your ass handed to you on a daily basis would be an efficient way to thread the no man’s land between active animosity and general tolerance. It was surprising, how freeing Bruce found their daily sparring. At first he’d been doubtful at best, never fully trusting himself to keep Hulk at bay when it came to any sort of physically strenuous activity, but Loki had somehow coaxed him into fighting, sparring, whatever you wanted to call it, and he was doing  _fine_. He was doing more than fine, he was enjoying himself. He was finding their sessions helpful and it showed - Bruce had actually slept full five hours for the first time in forever. He wasn’t scared by mere shadows anymore, and no one had managed to make him jump in at least a seven and a half hours.

It was the calmest he’d felt in what felt like eons, but that could be the light years talking.

This realisation hit him, when he was carrying a tray to his and Thor’s usual dinner spot. His hands weren’t gripping the tray like his life depended on it, and nothing was shaking. The nervous tick that had taken permanent residence on his temple was no longer there.

He sat down and started on his meal, waiting for Thor. Usually it didn’t take long for the other to join him, but during the past few days Thor had seemed busier than normal. Bruce had barely had any time to talk with him outside their dinners, and even then Thor seemed less lively than normal. For one, he wasn’t spitting food all over Bruce while enthusiastically explaining him one Asgardian custom or other. Maybe there was something going on with the people on board. Bruce hadn’t had any more patients recently, so it wasn’t anything violent or disease-ridden, but maybe it was good old politics.

Couple minutes later Thor finally arrived, carrying a tray piled with food. He sat down, and hastily apologised for being late, not really giving any concrete reasons. To Bruce’s infinite relief they did start their usual conversation, going through the day’s events with the little addition of Bruce not enclosing his sparring sessions with Loki. There wasn’t anything malicious to it, Bruce just didn’t think it was necessary.

“But Bruce, my friend, what is going on with you? I must admit, during the last few days you have seemed a lot calmer.”

Bruce chewed his food, trying not to choke.

“I think I’m just getting used to the whole being-on-a-spaceship thing”, he answered, trying to be an inconspicuous as possible.

“Huh, well, that is good news. I am glad that you find yourself at peace”, Thor said with a half-hearted smile.

Bruce took a bite of his meal and he smiled back, finding it difficult to say anything that wouldn’t make him feel like a bag of shit for lying at Thor. But what he was doing with Loki, it was private, right? They were bonding over shared scars and if Bruce were to tell Thor about that… it could end up bad, could it not?

“It’s all about practice”, Bruce said in the end, not technically lying.

“You do seem happier”, Thor said and shifted his attention to his meal and they continued to eat in silence.

 

It was early afternoon, or something close to it, based on the slightly dimmed lights of the ship. It was obvious the lights tried to emulate some sort of a day routine, but Bruce wasn’t sure what planet they were based on. He could swear days weren’t this long on Sakaar. He'd just finished his busywork at the sickbay, cataloguing their current medical supplies and cleaning anything that looked useful. In an hour he’d meet up with Loki again, and get himself thrown around the small cargo space that was far away from anything vital, and hence unknown to most. Bruce was looking forward to it, as usual.

“So, you and Thor finally got down and dirty, huh?” Valkyrie asked, having creeped to the sickbay without Bruce noticing. That had never been impossible before, but now that Bruce had discovered that he was capable of relaxing his muscles, it had become increasingly easier. He spaced out  _a lot_.

“What? I've done no such thing”, Bruce answered.

“Huh? Seriously? You’re cold-hearted, small guy. But also explains a lot. Who is it then?”

“What are you on about?”

“Well you’re obviously having sex with someone, so out with it! Can’t believe you’d break Thor’s heart like this though”, Valkyrie said as he hopped on one of the medical beds.

“I’m not having sex with anyone!”

“Oh, don’t lie to me, I know what a post-coital bliss looks like and you’re a walking example.”

It was then that Loki appeared into the sickbay door, and true to his style choosing the worst possible moment to utter the following words.

“Is it possible for us to postpone our appointment by an hour or so? I have something other to take care of first, but I will join you as soon as I can.”

Bruce just nodded, not giving it too much thought. He could wait, it wasn’t like he had a rigid schedule to stick to. It wasn’t until Loki had left with, that Bruce took a look at Valkyrie and connected their earlier conversation to what had just transpired. Shit.

Valkyrie looked at Bruce, her eyes as large as the bottoms of the whisky bottles she kept drinking, and her mouth was gaping in exaggerated shock. Or, maybe it was in proportion considering what she thought she had just witnessed.

“Loki? You’re fucking Loki? Bruce,  _Norns_ , I never knew you’d be that mean!”

“What? No. No! I am not- Do not even say that- No.”

Bruce’s breath was laboured. How did she dare to say that out loud, what the hell.

“We’re sparring! Fighting! You know, exercise”, Bruce tried to demonstrate this by lifting his hands and boxing empty air.

Valkyrie looked suspicious at first, but after a while she seemed to decide Bruce was talking the truth.

“Whatever you say, little guy.”

“What did you say about Thor?” Bruce asked as an afterthought, as the cloud of panic dissipated and he was able to reflect on what Valkyrie had just said, “I’m not mean."

“I thought you’d finally done the right thing and tied Thor to your bed! And I might have mentioned your general fucked-out vibe to Thor... and it got him really sad and mopey, and in retrospect that makes sense now.”

“Thor thinks I’m-- having sex with Loki?” Bruce wanted to die.

“No, he thinks you’re having sex with someone.”

“That’s not any better!”

“Didn’t say it was.”

They both stood quietly for a moment or two.

“He’s sad?”

“Oh, is he ever.”

“Huh.”  
  
So this opened up a whole new bag of possibilities that Bruce had not dared to think of before. 

“Hey, snap out of it. I’ll do you a favour and spell it out for you, small guy. Go make out with Thor. Run into his arms and climb that tree.”

“Why are you so into this?”

“Purely personal. I need Thor to get laid because currently he’s a nightmare to work with.”

“He might just be sad over something else.”

Valkyrie stared at him, her brows furrowed in anger.

“Bruce. Don’t.”

 

Later on that day Bruce found himself head to head with Loki, trying to fight him to the best of his abilities. Yet, without Hulk, Bruce could only do so much to a god without seriously hurting himself in the process. Thankfully, the focus in these sessions was less on winning and more just giving them a channel to let go of that pent-up energy that had always simmered under the surface without actually letting it boil. However, this particular time he found it harder than usual, and he couldn’t really focus on anything beyond “don’t die”. Loki seemed to notice this, as he sighed in frustration after the third time Bruce had done fuck all to dodge his attacks.

“Your mind is elsewhere. We can continue this some other time. I really rather you didn’t die at my hands”, Loki said.

“Sorry”, Bruce mumbled back.

“This is pathetic. Does this have something to do with my brother looking like someone slew a bilgesnipe on his behalf?”

“Um…”

“Sometimes it is infuriating how difficult you find words”, Loki looked like he was suffering, “You and my brother deserve each other.”

“Why are you saying that like it’s a bad thing”, Bruce asked and Loki rolled his eyes, as if to make a point.

“Go, find my oaf of a brother and do what you must. We shall continue this once you are not likely to accidentally kill yourself out of pure distraction.”

Bruce got himself off the floor, and shot a grateful smile towards Loki, who just gestured him to move along. Bruce left their little sparring area, feeling a bit worse for wear due to the all the blows that Loki had landed on him. Before he'd go out to seek Thor, Bruce decided to shower and change into a fresh pair of clothes. The decision was driven my equal parts of physical discomfort and nervous procrastination, but it wouldn’t hurt if he smelt nice and looked more put together when he finally talked to Thor.

 

Unlike Loki, Thor was always easy to find. Either the noise he made echoed throughout the ship like a well-placed lure, or the others on board kept track of his whereabouts. Or, as was currently the case, Bruce just seemed to know the thundering god well enough to know where to find him.

He approached the little room that they had all collectively named as “creep den” due to number of monitors that displayed live-footage from all over the ship. Now, Bruce would’ve liked to think it was due to security reasons, but the camera placements made it seem a bit more sinister and sexually charged. Thor had taken a weird liking to the room, after destroying all the cameras of course, because it was windowless and dimly-lit, it had a good chair to sit on and it worked as a small getaway spot from the demanding Asgardians.

Bruce knocked on the door.

It didn’t take long for Thor to come greet him, peeking at him through the narrow slit between the door and the doorframe.

“Hi”, Bruce said, “You busy?”

For a second it looked like Thor was trying to come up with an excuse, but to Bruce’s relief the god ended up stepping aside and letting Bruce in.

“What brings you here?” Thor asked as he sat down on the only chair in the room. This made Bruce feel like he was up for an interrogation, which didn’t make what he was about to say any easier.

“Do I need a reason to want to talk to you?”

“No, not at all! You’ve just seemed so… busy recently”, Thor said, trying to be nonchalant, but the look on his face made Bruce feel absolutely wretched. Here he’d thought he’d been subtle.

“Ah, yeah, about that.”

Bruce was pretty sure he looked as awkward as he felt. Words weren’t his forte, he came across better on paper than he did in person, because when he was writing he had time to think these things through. That's why he had seven PhDs. Yet to be fair, Bruce wasn’t sure he could’ve written anything coherent to Thor, even if he’d given all the time he needed.

“So, I heard from Valkyrie, that she uh, she told you, or in this case gossiped… or speculated, I think that’s a better word, that I’m involved with…” Bruce was  _struggling_ , “Oh hell.” 

“You’re involved with hell?” Thor asked, looking confused. Bless his face, bless his beautiful face for trying to make sense of Bruce.

“No, no. What I’m-- Did she tell you I’m sleeping with someone?”

Now it was Thor’s time to look awkwardly around the room and scratch his beard.

“Yes, she mentioned something along those lines.”

“Okay. Good. I mean, not good but-- Okay hear me out”, Bruce inhaled, trying to calm himself down in an effort to make more sense, “I’ve got nothing going on. I’ve just been fighting. With Loki. Not sleeping with anyone, nothing like that. Fights only. You know, hitting and throwing and that sort of stuff."

“You’ve been fighting with Loki? He’s hurting you?”

Thor had gone from timid and defeated to intense and downright murderous in the drop of a hat, and before Bruce could hastily convince Thor that it was nothing of the sort, just two former enemies bonding over violence, Thor had already disappeared through the door.

_Shit._

Bruce bolted after Thor, running as fast as he could. Luckily the god was easy to follow, and Bruce happened to know his destination. Loki usually occupied the bridge around dinner time, as it was void of everyone else. He was still a bit nervous around the Asgardians, despite his efforts to try to convince Bruce of the opposite.

Bruce was winded when he entered the bridge, but as he witnessed Thor hoisting Loki against the wall by the neck, he continued running till he reached the two.

“You dare to lay your hands on my friend, brother”, Thor bellowed. The air around them was crackling, and Bruce could feel his arm hairs reacting to the staticy air. He needed to intervene.

“No, Thor, no- listen up--”

“Oh Norns, I should have seen this coming”, Loki said, remarkably unaffected by Thor’s violent outburst.

“You won’t get away with this, I will-”

“Thor!” Bruce shouted and that got the god’s attention.

“He hasn’t done anything, Loki’s fine. He’s been helping, actually”, Bruce continued and that got Thor to lower Loki back on the ground. His hand still remained around the other’s neck, but Bruce could see it was no longer pressing down, just laying there as sort of a safeguard.

“But you said he’d attacked you.”

“No, I said he fought me. As in we’ve been sparring. Training.”

Before Thor could answer, Loki swatted away the hand on his neck and stepped around Thor. He made a show of fixing his shirt that had crumbled during Thor’s manhandling, and swept his hair back in place.

“I’ll leave you two to it”, Loki said, “This is too painful to witness.”

And with that he walked away, leaving Thor and Bruce alone in the empty bridge.

“You’ve been training with Loki?” and damn Thor had no right to look so hurt. Bruce was allowed to have other friends. Or, acquaintances, in this case.

“Yeah, it’s just something we decided to try and, and it’s been helping me. A lot”, Bruce answered sheepishly.

“Oh. Is that why you’ve appeared less… anxious? Not because you…” and now Thor was blushing and that in turn made Bruce blush. This was mortifying. He wanted nothing more than to follow Loki out of the room and jump through one of the ship's airlocks. But, he was an adult and he and Thor needed to have this conversation. Desperately.

“Yes! Training, that’s all. Helps me get rid off all the built-up energy.”

“Is this why you searched me out? To tell me you’re now sparring with Loki?”

“Uh. Not exactly. Um. Okay here goes nothing”, Bruce declared, “I really enjoy your company, and like our time together. More than I probably should. You’re, uh, good-looking and I… I… I like that?” 

Thor was looking at him, as if expecting him to continue.

“Oh. That was it?” Thor asked, looking baffled and Bruce let out an audible groan.

“I’m not good at talking, don’t act like it’s a surprise”, Bruce crossed his hands, knowing fully well that he was doing his best impression of a petulant child. An extremely attractive move on his part.

“Was that an attempt to confess your attraction to me?” Thor asked and he looked absolutely delighted. His eyebrows were close to his hairline and the smile was dazzling, making Bruce feel weak in the knees.

“Yes. Maybe. Depends on what you do next. I’d be careful.”

“Is that so”, Thor asked as he took a step closer, his voice dangerously low, “What if I were to say that I too like our time together. More than I should.”

“Now you’re just repeating what I say”, Bruce said, nailed to the spot. Thor was closing the distance between the two of them, and Bruce could not look away.

“Mhmm. What would you do if I kissed you?”

Now Bruce and Thor were standing toe to toe, and Bruce found it exceedingly difficult to breath, never mind think anything that didn’t involve Thor’s beautiful face and how dangerously close their mouths were.

“I’d probably kiss you back.”

“Probably?”

“You got to try it to find out.”

Thor’s lips were dry as they landed on Bruce’s, but he didn’t mind it, not one bit. He let his hands travel to the nape of Thor’s neck and pull him closer. The kiss was good, the beard rubbing against his chin was good and the hands finding their way around his waist were also good. Excellent, even.

 

It was later that day, when Bruce was sitting against the wall, rotating his shoulders and trying to get the kink out of his neck, when Loki approached him, offering his hand. Bruce took it and rose up.

“I must confess, I was not expecting to see you until tomorrow”, Loki said, and took a step away from Bruce. Bruce took a sidelong glance at Thor who was sitting on the other side of the cargo bay, talking with Valkyrie.

“He wanted to see what we got up to”, Bruce shrugged his shoulders, “Sorry.”

“He was bound to find out sooner or later.”

They both looked at Thor, as he let out a booming laughter at something Valkyrie had just said. She noticed them looking and winked, before continuing her conversation with Thor. Bruce cleared out his throat and turned away from the two. 

“Was it as agonizing as I think it was?" Loki asked, and he looked amused.

"Worse."

"My brother prides himself in having a better grasp on his emotions, but it's moments like these that I cannot help but think myself superior yet again." 

“You have such a high opinion of yourself, don’t you?” Bruce laughed a little. 

“When it comes to my brother, yes. You have no idea of what an oaf I have had to deal with for the better part of three millenia.”

“I don’t know. I like him”, Bruce said.

“You don’t say.”

“Don’t read too much into it.”

Loki was a person who constantly exuded the energy of someone who was always rolling their eyes, without never actually doing it, so it was a truly a treat to see the god do it now.

“You two deserve each other.”

“That’s what you keep saying”, Bruce smiled and walked to Thor, who was now back to fully focusing his eyes on him. It felt nice.

“I’ll expect to see you tomorrow”, Loki said as he walked through the door. There was a certain haste to his steps, as he tried to weasel away from Valkyrie, who was now following him after Thor had bid her farewell. 

Bruce hummed, noncommittally, having learned from the best.

“What were you two talking about? Did he warn you not to break my heart? Threatened to come after you were you to disrespect me? Oh, Loki, his ways of caring are always so violent-” Thor was beaming now, setting his hand on Bruce’s waist, “You must not take his words seriously, I will let no harm come to you.”

“No, no, he didn’t threaten me or anything. We just had a…” Bruce trailed off. What could he call the conversation? A heart-to-heart? No, it had just been a harmless conversation about emotions with a norse god and a nuclear accident. “... A chat. We just talked, this and that, you weren't mentioned at all.”

“Whatever you say”, Thor said conspirationally and kissed Bruce briefly, “You must let me take part in this some day. I’d be honoured to fight you. I promise to be gentle.”

“Oh, gentle? Go ahead, makes it easier for me to kick your ass in front of your brother.”  
  
“That a challenge?”  
  
“A promise."

And oh how Bruce loved to hear Thor laugh.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this hot mess, cool cat.
> 
> Hope you liked it!


End file.
